


Matchmaking Isn't A Competition, And If You Treat It Like One, You're Gonna Lose

by serpentineshadows



Series: Atsumu and Kuroo Try Matchmaking [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Established AtsuHina, Hijinks & Shenanigans, M/M, Miya Atsumu Being an Idiot, POV Miya Atsumu, Post-Haikyuu!! Chapter 402: Final Chapter: Challengers, a sprinkle of angst, atsumu experiences All the emotions, this just in from miya atsumu: miya osamu is the Worst brother
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:14:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26379385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serpentineshadows/pseuds/serpentineshadows
Summary: “At least one of ‘em needs a lil push,” Atsumu agrees. “Probably Bokkun,” he says, just as Kuroo says, “It would have to be Akaashi.”Kuroo’s mouth quirks, a small smile that doesn’t screamI make money by scamming you. “Interesting you’d say that.” His tone is playful, instead of provocative. “Are you suggesting that we be the ones to give them that push?”In which Atsumu meets someone who is finally willing to hear him out about matchmaking Bokuto and Akaashi, suffers through Bokuto's obliviousness and the woes of long distance, and is betrayed. Twice.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Miya Atsumu, side Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, very very minor Kuroo Tetsurou/Miya Osamu
Series: Atsumu and Kuroo Try Matchmaking [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1917139
Comments: 18
Kudos: 111





	Matchmaking Isn't A Competition, And If You Treat It Like One, You're Gonna Lose

**Author's Note:**

> as seems to be the theme of my quarantine, i will gift this fic to myself as a very belated birthday present
> 
> this fic is somewhat canon compliant, so there are spoilers for the entire manga, but i do play it fast & loose w/ the timeline for fic purposes and i make minor assumptions, such as: atsumu (and hinata) lives w/ bokuto & sakusa
> 
> edit 9/11/20: just fixing a small typo, not sure if that register as "updated" to anyone but sorry if it does, i just can't leave small things alone lol

Atsumu wakes with an unfamiliar heat at his back. In the sleepy haze of early morning, it takes a moment for him to remember: _oh, it’s Shouyou._

The arm hooked around his stomach squeezes tighter, like an affirmation— _this is not a dream_ —and Shouyou mumbles into his back, voice rough, “Five more minutes, Atsumu-san.”

They stay in bed for longer than five minutes, but Atsumu spends none of it sleeping. Instead, he lies awake, staring at the boring, eggshell-colored wall, his erratic heartbeat contrasting with Shouyou’s steady breathing. Shouyou’s arm burns where it touches him, a reminder that Atsumu is living a dream.

A dream in which he shares a bed, and that someone is not Osamu. The bed is not too small, and he doesn’t spend half the night fighting over pillows and blankets and which side stupid ‘Samu should remember to stay on. No, it’s a dream in which he shares a bed with someone radiant as the sun, and he gets paid to play volleyball. He’s never felt so sated in his life.

There’s no doubt he’s living the better life ( _take that, ‘Samu_ ).

“Something funny, Atsumu-san?”

“Nah, not really.”

Atsumu flips around to actually look at Shouyou’s face and confirm that yeah, there’s no way that Osamu can be happier right now. The soft morning light, filtering through their curtains, makes Shouyou _glow,_ and his eyes dance with mirth.

“You sure?” Shouyou’s tone is light, teasing. “You look like you’re thinking something real rude.”

“Just that I’m lucky.”

That makes Shouyou laugh, unleashing a puff of morning breath. Atsumu leans back, but that just makes Shouyou laugh harder. Atsumu tries to look away, to seem petulant, but Shouyou is too bright, and Atsumu can never have his fill of looking. “This had nothing to do with luck, Atsumu-san.”

“Yer right,” Atsumu says, but he leans in to kiss Shouyou anyway, searching for a physical confirmation to really hammer it in: he has the sun in his grasp for now.

They make breakfast in relative silence during the sweet spot when Sakusa is already long gone and Bokuto hasn’t woken up yet. Atsumu likes to slack off, a little, and watch Shouyou work; there’s something captivating about his calm confidence, reminiscent of the way he smoothly receives the nastiest of Atsumu’s serves during practice, like the movements have been ingrained into his body and have become a part of him.

The best part is, Shouyou doesn’t complain that Atsumu is contributing absolutely nothing to their breakfast. He teases Atsumu (“I guess you’re not as good of a cook as Osamu-san,” coupled with a dramatic sigh), and he makes Atsumu set the table for them as he finishes up, but he doesn’t side-eye Atsumu with the judgiest glare in existence, and he doesn’t shove Atsumu out of the way (rudely!) when he _does_ try to make a contribution.

Breakfast with Shouyou is truly superior, all offense to Osamu intended.

“So I’ve got that thing with Kenma today,” Shouyou says, shoveling food into his mouth. It should be unattractive, but it isn’t. “You wanted to come with, right?”

Atsumu takes a bite and maintains eye contact as he chews. Shouyou’s a good cook. “Right, didja get more details about what they want you to do?”

“Nope!”

Atsumu does not almost choke on his food, and Shouyou definitely does not burst out into laughter, spraying half-eaten chunks across the table. After Atsumu does not finish wiping up the table because there’s no need to, he asks, “Wait, so ya still don’t know anything. How long ago did they ask you again?”

Shouyou smiles sheepishly, and even the sight of that makes Atsumu’s heart turn uncomfortably. “Oops, my bad!” Shouyou laughs, and he’s clearly not sorry at all. Atsumu forgives him anyway. “Kenma wouldn’t make me do anything super weird, though. It’ll be fine!”

And it is fine, for the most part. It doesn’t take _too_ long to get to where they’re meeting Kenma, but that doesn’t matter anyway because traveling with Shouyou doesn’t feel like a chore. He can’t stop moving, either bouncing in his seat, or gesturing with his hands, as he regales Atsumu with tale after tale about his friendship with Kenma. Some of it, Atsumu’s heard before, but Shouyou’s enthusiasm, the way his eyes shine, draw Atsumu’s full attention anyway. (“A match made in heaven,” Sakusa commented drily once, when Atsumu turned out to be the only one who followed one of Shouyou’s convoluted stories, complete with sound effects, and Atsumu took that as a compliment. _Yes, thank you very much, Omi-Omi, we_ are _a match made in heaven._ )

“I’m not boring you, am I?” Shouyou asks at one point, breaking himself off midway through a riveting narration of how Kenma got stuck up a tree once, trying to save a cat.

“‘Course not, I’d tell ya if you were,” Atsumu reassures, and that pulls the most brilliant smile out of Shouyou. _Do you know how dangerous you are,_ he doesn’t ask, and he didn’t ask, when Shouyou first confessed to him, face flushed a color as bright as his hair. _I’d do anything for you, for that smile,_ Atsumu doesn’t say, didn’t say, because it’s too soon, and he wouldn’t ever want to pull Shouyou down from where he’s meant to be with the weight of what he feels.

But maybe Shouyou can tell anyway, reading his soul laid bare, because Atsumu can’t bring himself to ever look away. “I guess you would.” Shouyou laughs, and continues where he left off, like he expects Atsumu to remember.

(He does.)

The worst part comes when they arrive. Kenma whisks Shouyou away and Atsumu is left to stand on the sidelines, watching Shouyou wreathed in a halo of light, about to film a video undoubtedly better than Tobio-kun’s stupid curry commercial.

“You’re here with Shrimpy?” one of the guys standing near him asks. He’s dressed in a suit, his hair is absolutely horrendous, and his face oozes fake charm: it’s the conman-looking guy from the JVA who asked Shouyou to do this in the first place. “Hinata, I mean,” the guy clarifies when Atsumu doesn’t say anything.

“Yeah, what’s it to you?” Atsumu is aware he’s being unpleasant, but that doesn’t even wipe the smile off the guy’s face.

“I’m Kuroo, childhood friend of Kodzuken over there.” Kuroo’s smile widens, and warning signs go off in Atsumu’s head. It reminds him of Osamu’s smile just before he gets Atsumu in trouble with their parents: infuriatingly smug. “Him and Hinata are _real_ close, you know—”

“I know that,” Atsumu cuts him off before he can say anything more, and Kuroo lifts an eyebrow, clearly amused. Atsumu’s heard all about how Kenma sponsored Shouyou’s stint in Brazil. There’s no way that would’ve happened without them being _close._

“You don’t have anything to worry about though,” Kuroo reassures, like he knows he’s dug his fingers into Atsumu’s insecurities and that empty, nonchalant statement wipes his fingers clean. It makes Atsumu _burn,_ but Kuroo just waves away his sharp retorts and adds, “I know pining when I see it. Like Bokuto and Akaashi, _god_ they’re insufferable.”

Atsumu recognizes the abrupt change in conversation topic for what it is—an olive branch—but he’s not gonna let a stranger get away with poking at his weaknesses and moving on, unbothered. “Sure yer not noticin’ how close Shouyou and Kenma are ‘cause _you’re_ the one worryin’ ‘bout it?”

Kuroo laughs, then, and it’s ugly and loud, and Kenma whips around to glare at them. Shouyou looks over and smiles at Atsumu, and that makes his heart warm in a different way. “I love Kenma—”

There’s a _but_ there, waiting to be said. Atsumu interrupts before Kuroo can finish his thought: “You sound just like Bokkun.”

Kuroo laughs, quieter this time. “Trust me, I don’t talk about how I love Kenma 24/7. I don’t think anyone can sound ‘just like Bokuto’ when it comes to talking about Akaashi.”

Atsumu stops to think, watching Shouyou launch himself into the air. Osamu was probably sick of hearing anything and everything Shouyou-related, but—“That’s true. Bokkun’s something else.” He knows more about Akaashi Keiji than he really should, considering he’s only met the guy a couple times.

“He really should just confess already,” Kuroo sighs. Again, Atsumu is eerily reminded of Osamu: he’s heard that sigh before, accompanied by threats to his person and doors slammed in his face when he just wanted some onigiri from his favorite brother— _no, really, ‘Samu, I swear I’m not gonna talk about Shouyou-kun this time!_ “I’m surprised Akaashi hasn’t gotten the message yet, honestly.”

“At least one of ‘em needs a lil push,” Atsumu agrees. “Probably Bokkun,” he says, just as Kuroo says, “It would have to be Akaashi.”

Kuroo’s mouth quirks, a small smile that doesn’t scream _I make money by scamming you._ “Interesting you’d say that.” His tone is playful, instead of provocative. It seems that Atsumu has an agreeable audience for once, open to hearing his ideas on what should be done about the Bokuto-Akaashi situation. (“You’d haveta step over my dead body to make me yer accomplice.” Osamu didn’t even bother to look up from his task, and no threat about killing him dead fazed him. Stupid siblings, immune to stupid threats.) “Are you suggesting that we be the ones to give them that push?”

“Maybe,” Atsumu says, but he honestly expects nothing of it. (In retrospect, he has underestimated the former Nekoma captain’s talent for latching onto terrible ideas and executing them.)

* * *

“Fancy seeing you here,” Kuroo says to Atsumu, as he squishes Bokuto further into the booth, thus maximizing Sakusa’s contact with the wall. Bokuto, for his part, is unbothered and continues to regale his audience of one with tales of how awesome Akaashi is.

“This is a team-only bonding event,” he responds, which is not true—their whole team isn’t even here, and Osamu joins them on occasion, as does Akaashi—but there’s no one around that will bother to correct him.

“Is that so?”

As if to spite Atsumu, Kuroo turns to Shouyou, dragging him and Bokuto into conversation. That leaves both Sakusa and Atsumu miserable on opposite ends of the booth. At least Atsumu isn’t the one in danger of being smacked in the face by Bokuto’s ever enthusiastic gesturing, and he gets to stare at Shouyou’s side profile. He’s more animated than usual, if that’s even possible, and part of Atsumu is greedy for Shouyou to always be this happy, but the other, more shameful part is greedy for Shouyou’s attention to be directed at him and him alone. (The former will always win out.)

Somehow, Bokuto has managed to steer the conversation back to Akaashi, and while Shouyou seems content to listen, it seems that everyone else is sick of hearing the same reasons why Bokuto is in love with Akaashi, just rehashed a million different ways. Sakusa is glaring intently at the table, which could mean a myriad of things, but it does not mean he will help Atsumu make Bokuto confess. (Yes, Atsumu _did_ approach him for help. Look how dire the situation is! They practically went on a _date_ after the match against the Adlers, but their relationship hasn’t progressed into the romantic territory, as far as Atsumu can tell. But no, Omi-Omi had to be all heartless and fix Atsumu with one of the most condescending expressions ever—joke’s on him, Atsumu has been attached by the hip to the king of condescending expressions for the majority of his life, so he’s immune now—and decisively said, “Are you stupid or just stupid?”)

Kuroo, meanwhile, is staring right at Atsumu, and this might only be the second time they’ve met, but Atsumu knows they’re on the same wavelength.

_We have to get them together._

The first time, that suggestion thrown into the air, carelessly—it held as much weight as telling an old high school classmate “we should hang out sometime.” But this second meeting, this confirmation that they both think _something_ needs to be done, it’s like fate, or something else inevitable, in the same way that Atsumu becoming Shouyou’s setter was inevitable.

“Let’s give them a push,” Atsumu says to Kuroo once the dinner’s over, and Sakusa and Bokuto have both gotten up to go to the bathroom. Shouyou’s eyes dart between Atsumu and Kuroo, but he doesn’t say anything.

“I knew you’d come around.” Kuroo’s smile is razor-sharp and oily, like a threatening conman’s.

They exchange numbers before they part ways, the barest bones of a plan laid down: Atsumu will work on getting Bokuto to confess in Osaka while Kuroo will try his best with Akaashi in Tokyo. A foolproof plan.

“What were you and Kuroo-san talking about?” Shouyou asks later that night, voice half-muffled because he insists on squishing his face into Atsumu’s chest.

“We’re gonna get Bokkun and Akaashi together.”

Atsumu does not expect the burst of laughter from Shouyou, who leans back to get a better look at Atsumu’s expression. The part of him that’s smitten with everything Shouyou does, the one that wishes _I want you to laugh forever_ wars with the ugly, vicious part of him that wants to lash out: _what’re you laughing at?_

“What’re ya laughing at,” he grumbles, and it only comes out good-natured because he’s talking to _Shouyou._

Shouyou lifts a hand to Atsumu’s brow and smooths out his frown. “I didn’t expect you to be the meddling type, Atsumu-san.” It’s a fair answer, but even in the dim light from the streetlamp outside, Atsumu can recognize Shouyou’s secretive smile, the one that reminds Atsumu that as much as he wants to keep Shouyou all for himself, Shouyou is the sun, and he belongs to no one but himself. So many others have a shared history with him that Atsumu does not.

“My spikers’ relationship successes are my relationship successes,” Atsumu mumbles, and Shouyou’s smile shatters into laughter once again. Even when it fades, Shouyou’s smile lingers, and this time, it’s the one reserved for Atsumu: bemused, yet fond.

“Well, mine _are_ yours,” Shouyou concedes, and Atsumu kisses him to wipe that smug expression off his face.

* * *

Atsumu is convinced that he can win this competition. See, Kuroo has his work cut out for him. Atsumu doesn’t know Akaashi very well, but the guy has to be aware of his feelings for Bokuto. The problem there is, how do you get someone who doesn’t think they have a chance to confess? Answer: you don’t. Which means Bokuto has to be the one to do it. Atsumu just needs to nudge Bokuto in the right direction, get Bokuto to recognize that he thinks and talks about Akaashi all the time, not because they are _very good friends,_ but because he is _in love._ Then, Bokuto can do the rest of the work by confessing.

It’s _supposed_ to be a foolproof plan, but Atsumu has perhaps underestimated how oblivious Bokuto is.

For his first attempt, Atsumu corners Bokuto after practice and asks after Akaashi, trying his best to be subtle in getting Bokuto to reevaluate his feelings about Akaashi. A very unnecessary thesis on Akaashi’s work-life balance and general social life later, Atsumu learns two things: he shouldn’t bother with asking Bokuto about Akaashi or being subtle. It’s a waste of time.

Luckily, Atsumu is a quick learner. He goes straight for the kill with his next try.

When they’re in the locker room, and Bokuto is loudly debating to himself what he should get Akaashi for Christmas, Atsumu sees his opportunity.

“Why don’t you two go on a date?”

Bokuto whirls around to face Atsumu and hums. He’s considering it, which Atsumu decides pleasantly is _progress._ What’s less pleasant is the snickering from everyone else, including Shouyou. It’s not _that_ funny that he’s playing matchmaker. He’s just trying to share the happiness and maybe endure less pining after Akaashi.

“Great idea, Tsum-Tsum!” Bokuto eventually says, clapping him on the shoulder. “Maybe I’ll do that.”

Atsumu sticks out his tongue, perhaps somewhat pettily, at the rest of his teammates for laughing at his suggestion, but none of them are particularly crushed. Which would be disappointing except Shouyou grabs Atsumu by the hand and drags him out of the locker room, whisking away thoughts of Bokuto and Akaashi.

_got bokkun to ask akaashi on a date, take that_

_lol id be impressed but_ _  
_ _bo and i say we’re going out on dates all the time_

_but were they CHRISTMAS EVE dates??_

_yea_

When Atsumu throws his phone at the nightstand, Shouyou reads the texts and laughs.

“Don’t mind, Atsumu-san,” he says, rubbing a soothing hand along the length of Atsumu’s shoulder, and Atsumu feels himself relaxing even though he wants to hold onto his anger. “Kuroo-san just likes to provoke people.”

Apparently, “Kuroo-san” also knows Bokuto very well because Bokuto comes back from Tokyo a normal level of enthusiastic. Nothing about him screams _I just got together with the love of my life._ It’s infuriating, and Atsumu tries to not let it affect his performance. If some serves almost hit Bokuto in the back of the head, well, Atsumu’s still working on perfecting his control.

“So, how was the date,” Atsumu blurts out after practice because he can’t handle it anymore. He needs to know how and why Bokuto is acting so _normal._

“It was great!” Bokuto lets out a dreamy sigh and launches into a detailed explanation of everything he and Akaashi did.

It takes all of Atsumu’s restraint to not grab Bokuto by the shoulders, shake him around, and scream “so are you dating or not?” in his face like a maniac.

“Sounds wonderful,” Atsumu says when Bokuto finally stops, and Bokuto beams. How can someone be so oblivious to their own feelings?

The maddening day is made worse when Atsumu gets a text from Kuroo. _so howd their “date” go,_ it reads, mocking. Shouyou grabs Atsumu’s attention away from his phone by wrapping his scarf around the both of them. Thankfully, none of their teammates are around to witness how quickly Atsumu flushes.

“It’s cold outside,” Shouyou says and links their arms together.

“Yeah,” Atsumu chokes out in response, which makes Shouyou laugh.

“ _We_ went on a Christmas date, and we did couple-y stuff like this. How are you not immune yet?”

_Because it’s you,_ Atsumu wants to say, so he does. His own embarrassment is worth it to see the way Shouyou reddens, smiling back at Atsumu, proving that he’s not as unaffected as he seems.

* * *

“Who’s ever heard of platonic dates? Who even says _let’s go on a date_ and goes on that date and doesn’t mean it romantically?”

The look Osamu gives him is withering, but when they were younger, he practiced his most threatening glares on Atsumu all the time. Osamu should know by now that threatening looks aren’t enough to deter him.

“Wonderful that you’ve graduated from gushing over _Shouyou-kun_ to gushing over _Bokkun and Akaashi,_ ” Osamu says with the most wonderful deadpan delivery. He’s really stepped into the straight man role to Atsumu’s comic, a natural progression after Aran graduated and wasn’t there to react to their collective weirdness anymore.

“You don’t understand—”

“—I’ve heard more than enough of this—”

“—how _excruciating_ it is to see how hard Bokuto is pining after Akaashi without even realizing it!”

Atsumu gets a pointed look for his troubles. “I think I do.”

“I was not _that_ bad,” Atsumu insists, but he’s fighting a losing battle. This is the price he has to pay for Osamu to listen to his whining: ammunition in future arguments.

Osamu eventually sends him packing with an argument lost, tuna mayo onigiri (as well as the omurice onigiri that Osamu only makes for Shouyou), and his problems still unsolved.

* * *

Atsumu does _not_ get desperate enough that he cracks and straight up asks Bokuto, “Do you love Akaashi?”

The phrasing is a mistake. Bokuto doesn’t even hesitate before answering, “Of course!” Atsumu can’t even begin trying to clarify— _I meant, do you even know you’re in love with Akaashi_ —before Bokuto frowns and asks, “Does it seem like I _don’t_ love Akaashi?”

No one on the team appreciates the billionth “here are the million ways I love Akaashi” speech from Bokuto, and all of them blame Atsumu. Which, he supposes, is fair, but Atsumu would like to argue that this wouldn’t even be happening if Bokuto and Akaashi would just come to their senses and start dating.

* * *

_have you made any progress_

_hahahahahaha_ _  
_ _youre so funny tsumu_

_don’t call me that_

_akaashi is a tough nut to crack_ _  
_ _i have to bribe him to hang out w me now LOL_

_its been MONTHS_

_make that years dude_ _  
_ _you think i havent been dropping hints since hs???_

_i asked bokkun if he loves akaashi and he said YES OF COURSE_

_lol i heard_ _  
_ _akaashi wasnt even that flustered to hear that???_ _  
_ _i really cant figure out why he hasnt confessed yet_ _  
_ _he KNOWS that bo would say yes_

_theyve gone on DATES, howre they not together_

_again i go on dates w bo all the time!!_ _  
_ _but hm, why are they both so stubborn_ _  
_ _my wallet is crying_

_arent you rich_

_my wallet is still crying_

* * *

All good things come to an end.

Atsumu almost feels like he’s in high school again, hearing Osamu insist that he’s not gonna go pro, that there’s something better out there for him, like _anything_ could be better than the feel of the ball beneath his hands, the satisfaction of stealing point after point from the opposing team. Over the years, Atsumu has learned there could be things at least equal to the rush he gets from volleyball. Watching Shouyou’s side profile, the flutter of his lashes, those damningly expressive eyes.

No, this isn’t high school, and he isn’t losing childhood fantasies of going pro with his brother. He isn’t _losing_ anything, technically, not completely, because—

“We can do long distance,” Shouyou says, stupidly confident, like he’s had experience, and Atsumu swallows down the urge to say, “Like you and Tobio-kun did?” Shouyou is determined, his mind made up, and even though he’s carving up Atsumu’s heart, Atsumu never wants him to even _look_ hurt. (That’s a lie. Part of Atsumu wants Shouyou to look devastated as Atsumu feels.)

Atsumu doesn’t say anything at all because he’s not sure words, pernicious as poison, won’t come spilling out of his mouth. Shouyou seems to understand that. He manhandles Atsumu into a tight hug, and they’re both savoring it—the scent, the touch, what it feels like to be in each other’s presence.

“We’ll do long distance,” Shouyou whispers, and he repeats that over and over again, like a prayer, like their relationship will survive if he says it enough.

“Sure,” Atsumu answers, eventually, because he _wants_ but he can’t bring himself to hope.

* * *

_akaaaashiiii is getting annoyed w me_

_so am i._

_ouch_ _  
_ _rude!_ _  
_ _whats crawled up your ass and died_

_OH_ _  
_ _just heard about shouyou kun_ _  
_ _if it makes you feel better, i think itll work out_

_it doesnt_

_well it should_ _  
_ _i am best friends w kodzuken who is VERY close to shouyou kun after all_

* * *

Atsumu is aware that he copes a little unhealthily. He throws all of himself into volleyball because he won’t—can’t—lose to whoever’s setting for Shouyou in Brazil, and the only reason he doesn’t stay late enough for the coach and captain to yell at him is because he wants to be home to catch Shouyou as he’s waking up.

The others do comment on Atsumu’s behavior, but Atsumu is…vicious, in a way he hasn’t been in a long time. Meian lectures Atsumu, undeterred, but even Sakusa lightens up on the teasing and Bokuto, oblivious though he may be a majority of the time, gets the hint, too.

Especially after the one time Bokuto was happily chattering about Akaashi, as usual, and Atsumu just. Couldn’t handle it anymore.

Apparently, that’s all it takes to get Bokuto to stop talking about Akaashi.

Guilt simmers in Atsumu’s gut, mixing with all the other unpleasant emotions. Jealousy, loneliness, _betrayal._

“You shouldn’t have done that, Atsumu-san,” Shouyou chides him, lightly, but Atsumu feels the rebuke stabbing him through the heart all the same.

“I miss you,” he lets himself say. It’s already too much. He buries the rest— _I miss falling asleep beside you, I miss waking up with you, I miss setting for you, I even miss your disgusting morning breath._ Even the thought that it’s summer, unbearably hot, but Atsumu would rather lay next to Shouyou, pressed skin to skin, sweating, than be so far apart: that gets buried, too. 

Shouyou pinches his lips together. His hair is extra bright in the early morning light. “I know,” he says back, _I miss you, too_ unsaid. It’s in his voice, though, the sad glint in his eyes, the slight downturn of his mouth.

Atsumu is terrible, so he savors all of it, the evidence that the separation is killing Shouyou just as much as it’s killing him.

He will sustain himself on whatever Shouyou is willing to give him.

* * *

Osamu is one of the only ones, maybe even _the_ only one, who treats Atsumu the same. He’s used to dealing with Atsumu at his worst, and he’s been on the receiving end of Atsumu’s nastiest insults too many times to count.

That’s why Atsumu tries to visit Onigiri Miya as often as possible, but Osamu makes business trips up to Tokyo just as often, which fuels Atsumu’s bad mood. (Is it just a _mood_ when it lingers for months and months on end?)

(Perhaps this is for the best though because it means Atsumu hasn’t bothered Osamu enough for him to threaten Atsumu with “d’you _want_ me to call Kita-san?”)

Thankfully, this time, the door is unlocked and Osamu is there when Atsumu strolls in after hours. It looks like he’s concocting something new, and he’s not going to give Atsumu the attention he craves, content to work in silence.

So Atsumu has to be the one to break it.

“That a new flavor you’re makin’?” he starts off, innocently enough, but watching Osamu combine a weird mix of ingredients reminds him of the stupid omurice onigiri he used to make when Atsumu still had Shouyou to go home to. His mood quickly sours, and Atsumu resorts to what he knows best to wash the bitter taste of _missing Shouyou_ away. “Hope it tastes better than pencil shavings ‘n graphite. Mom sure enjoyed that when we were younger.”

Osamu’s knife pauses, his hands perfectly still. He doesn’t look up, but Atsumu is burning with anticipation. They’ve been building up to an argument, something to knock some sense into Atsumu’s brain, someone to tell him to slow down and just _stop_ and maybe let him yell a little bit.

“Yeah, she enjoyed it,” Osamu says lightly. He looks up, his eyes hard like diamonds. “Just like you enjoyed Shouyou-kun ditching you for Brazil.”

_That’s too far,_ Atsumu doesn’t say. Osamu hasn’t even moved his knife, but Atsumu feels like he cut his chest clean open. And the little shit doesn’t even wait for Atsumu’s response, just turns back to his cutting board and stupid collection of weird ingredients.

Atsumu storms out of the shop. He waits one second, two, but Osamu doesn’t chase after him. Figures.

He spends the entire trip home fuming, and when his phone lights up with a call from Shouyou later, he ignores it. He’ll want to ask, _why_ did _ya ditch me for Brazil?_ Too selfish, trying to tie down the sun, and he won’t get the answer he craves anyway.

_Atsumu?_  
_Are you ok???_

* * *

“Having relationship troubles, Tsum-Tsum?”

Usually, Atsumu would be willing to entertain Bokuto for at least a little bit, but with Sakusa’s added “he’s missing the light of his life,” paired with that infuriatingly smug smirk, Atsumu is not in a charitable mood.

“So what if I am?” Atsumu snarls, but Bokuto must be a saint because he just pats Atsumu’s shoulder commiseratingly.

“Communication is key!” Bokuto nods to himself. “Me and Akaashi talk it out _all_ the time.”

Of course he brings it back to Akaashi. “That’s different, and you know it.”

“Sure it is,” Bokuto says, unfailingly good-natured. “You’re super long distance, but doesn’t that mean communication is even _more_ important?”

Atsumu hates it when Bokuto makes more sense than him, so he shoves his way past Bokuto out of the locker room and stomps onto the court.

Osamu is there, waiting, when Atsumu leaves practice for the day. He shoves a bag into Atsumu’s arms and looks like he’d rather be anywhere else.

Atsumu peeks inside the bag. There’s a _lot_ of _otoro_ sushi. An expensive amount. Atsumu internally apologizes to Osamu for picturing his head as the volleyball for all the serves he hit today.

“Who’d ya rob to get this?” 

His voice comes out a lot colder than he means it to, but oh well. It makes Osamu flush bright red, and Atsumu takes an inordinate amount of pleasure in watching him squirm. Let him think for at least a little bit longer that his apology’s not accepted.

“Just shut up and take it,” Osamu grumbles, “or I’ll take it back.”

“I’ll take it,” Atsumu snaps, holding the bag away from Osamu. Atsumu has learned that Osamu is shameless enough to take back his apology bribes, the jerk.

“Talk to _Shouyou-kun,_ ” Osamu says, as casually as he can, almost sing-songy, while refusing to look Atsumu in the eyes at all.

“I will,” Atsumu insists, and that’s all they say about that.

Osamu follows Atsumu all the way home, they talk about things that don’t matter, and Osamu feels brave enough to steal some of the apology sushi from Atsumu. 

It’s an alright end to the day.

What improves it is the call from Shouyou after Osamu leaves.

“Atsumu-san!” Shouyou shouts as soon as Atsumu picks up. “You didn’t respond to my texts from yesterday. Are you feeling okay?”

_It was just stupid ‘Samu,_ Atsumu almost says, which isn’t exactly _wrong,_ but—“I just missed you,” he ends up saying. It’s a mistake, Atsumu knows. He can’t look at the screen because even the thought of Shouyou looking disappointed, saying _I thought you knew what you were getting into, Atsumu-san, I can’t give up my dreams for you_ is too much.

Instead, he gets: “I missed you, too, Atsumu-san!” Atsumu risks a glance at the screen, and there’s the most adorable smile on Shouyou’s face. He can’t look away. “Not picking up my calls is a funny way of showing it, though.”

Atsumu flushes. “I just—”

“Have trouble expressing genuine emotions, I know!” Atsumu splutters, but god, he isn’t even _mad_ because Shouyou’s giggling at his reaction and Atsumu misses being able to reach out and touch that smile. “I’m just kidding. I heard that you’re not even obsessing over Bokuto-san and Akaashi-san anymore though! Are you _sure_ you’re okay?”

“I don’t _obsess._ ”

Shouyou hums noncommittally.

“I don’t! And since when is me talkin’ about Bokkun’s not-relationship a sign of me being healthy?”

“You talked about them all the time before I left!” Shouyou says brightly. “It’s strange not hearing every little update anymore.” Atsumu doesn’t think he’s imagining the slight wistfulness in his voice.

“I’d rather talk about you,” Atsumu blurts out. Embarrassing, but it’s worth it to see Shouyou blush and have him start rambling about what his team’s like in Brazil.

Their conversation ends too soon even though they’ve extended it longer than usual, talking throughout Shouyou’s breakfast and his commute, when it’s harder to hear him amidst all the hustle and bustle.

“Goodnight, Atsumu-san,” Shouyou says, voice soft. Atsumu admires how he looks, eyes impossibly fond, skin lit up by the sunlight. “Sweet dreams!”

Atsumu sleeps better than he has in a long while.

* * *

_whats your progress_

_oho_ _  
_ _now his royal highness deigns to speak to me_

_no wonder youre not getting anywhere with akaashi_

_ouch_

_i havent made any progress with bokkun bc im a mess_ _  
_ _whats your excuse_

_im involved in my own love affair rn_

_just say youre useless like a normal person_

_OUCH_ _  
_ _tsumu dont be mean_

_i told you to not call me that_

* * *

“You’re in a good mood, Tsum-Tsum!” Bokuto remarks.

“He made up with Shouyou-kun,” Sakusa says.

Atsumu glares and points his chopsticks in Sakusa’s direction, which provokes an equally vicious glare from Sakusa. “It wasn’t a fight.”

Sakusa rolls his eyes. “He talked with Shouyou-kun.”

“I talk with him all the time! And what would you know about it anyway?”

“He texted us to ask what’s up with you,” Bokuto practically shouts and continues on despite Atsumu’s attempts to interrupt him. “I’m glad you got it all figured out though. Sucks when you’re fighting.”

“What would _you_ know about that?”

Bokuto laughs. “I get into arguments with Akaashi sometimes! It _definitely_ sucks more when you’re apart, you know?”

Atsumu does not respond, which doesn’t seem to bother Bokuto much, who keeps talking about Akaashi. Instead, he looks over to Sakusa and tries to catch his eye, share a _did he really just say that?_ look, but Sakusa refuses to cooperate.

So Atsumu is left to wonder at what Bokuto said for the rest of dinner, barely responsive to any attempts Bokuto makes at an actual, working conversation, until he can hurry to his own room and wait for Shouyou to call and unleash all his thoughts.

_Did Bokkun really just compare my_ romantic _relationship with Shouyou to his relationship with Akaashi? How are they still not together?_

Unfortunately, it’s not yet late enough in Japan for Shouyou to be awake in Brazil, and Atsumu _really_ can’t hold his thoughts in any longer, so he settles for texting Kuroo.

_how is bokkun so dumb_

_hey!_

_whyre you getting offended_

_ive been told that bokuto and i are the same level of idiotic_ _  
_ _insult him and you insult me_

_he compared MY relationship with shouyou to his nonexistent one with akaashi_ _  
_ _hes said he loves akaashi before_ _  
_ _theyve gone on DATES_ _  
_ _how can he NOT know hes in love_

_beats me_ _  
_ _we’re not the same breed of idiotic_ _  
_ _so i dont always know what bo’s thinking_

_PLEASE tell me youve made progress with akaashi_

_chill dude_ _  
_ _i told you bribing akaashi is expensive_ _  
_ _it adds up_

_we shouldve switched targets_

_i assure you akaashi would find you just as annoying_

_no wonder why you have to bribe him to speak with you_

* * *

It honestly feels like a dream that the Olympics are so soon. Atsumu has made the national team, of course, but there’s a difference between the upcoming Olympics and the previous one. It’s the first time he gets to see Shouyou in what feels like forever, and they get to play on the same team again.

When the team’s all gathered up, _Atsumu_ is the first one Shouyou goes to. They share a hug that probably edges on the side of too long, in which Atsumu savors the feeling of having Shouyou in his arms again. (“Missed you,” Shouyou whispers for only him to hear, and Atsumu hugs him tighter.) Atsumu does _not_ tear up a little, and no one makes fun of him for it.

And of course, when they go to the floor where all of them are rooming, it goes unsaid that Atsumu and Shouyou are sharing a room.

The moment the door swings shut behind them, Shouyou leaps into Atsumu’s arms.

“How much do you wanna bet Bokuto-san is gonna sneak Akaashi-san in?”

“Please stop talking about Bokkun,” Atsumu says as he presses a kiss to Shouyou’s lips. Shouyou’s laughter really ruins Atsumu’s plans to thoroughly kiss him, but Atsumu doesn’t mind _too much._ _We have time,_ he thinks, and shoves the cheesier thought— _just being here with you is enough_ —further down.

“But you _love_ talking about them,” Shouyou teases, encouraging Atsumu towards the large, comfy-looking bed.

“Not when we’re,” Atsumu kisses the corner of Shouyou’s grin, “together.”

“How sweet!” Shouyou says, running his hands through Atsumu’s hair, messing it up, and finally kisses Atsumu back properly.

* * *

The thing is, Bokuto _does_ sneak Akaashi into the Olympic Village. They’re together almost constantly, and no one questions it, and Atsumu wants to tear his hair out once he finally notices it.

“They’ve been like that since the first day,” Sakusa deadpans. “I don’t see what’s the big deal.”

“The _first day_?” Atsumu shrieks. Clearly, Atsumu has been neglecting his role as matchmaker.

“Guess you were too busy to notice,” Sakusa says with a pointed look at Atsumu’s concealer-heavy neck.

All their other teammates have equally lackluster responses, which means Atsumu has to resort to consulting the only other person who really understands.

“You _don’t_ sneak your platonic best friend into the Olympic Village and hang out around him the entire time,” Atsumu hisses. He knows he probably looks and sounds a little insane, but this is getting a little ridiculous.

Kuroo opens his mouth. “Well—”

“Stop tellin’ me you do weirdly romantic things with yer platonic best friend!”

From Atsumu’s other side, Osamu snorts. Oh yeah, he forgot to introduce them before he launched into his rant.

“By the way! ‘Samu, this is Kuroo. Kuroo, ‘Samu—”

“—we’ve met—”

“—anyway, my point _is,_ wait you’ve met before?”

“How do you think I’ve been bribing Akaashi?” Kuroo gestures at Osamu. “He _really_ likes Onigiri Miya.” Kuroo does a terrible thing where he wiggles his eyebrows. “And I do, too.”

Atsumu doesn’t even bother to grace that with a response, especially since Osamu seems receptive—gross to think about—so he tries to steer the conversation back on track again. “Anyway, back to Bokkun and Akaashi, there’s _no way_ anyone can be that oblivious!”

“Right, about that—”

“Who died and made you the expert on relationships, ‘Tsumu?” Osamu interrupts Kuroo because he lives to make Atsumu’s life worse.

“I’m the only one here in a relationship! Therefore, I _am_ the expert.”

“Right, so about that—”

“Who says I’m not in a relationship?” Osamu interrupts Kuroo again. He’s smirking, but it’s a bluff because…

“You would’ve told me if you were,” Atsumu scoffs, and Osamu laughs right in his face. Atsumu’s used to that, so what actually stings is that Kuroo laughs as well.

“Surprise, I _am_ dating someone.” Osamu says this in a monotone, which makes it all the more suspicious.

“Wait, no, tell him about Bokuto and Akaashi first,” Kuroo interjects before Osamu can continue, and Atsumu resists the urge to murder him on the spot.

“Oh, so you’ve finally made progress?” Atsumu snaps. “When _I’m_ the one who’s been right there with them this whole time?”

“You’re both idiots,” Osamu contributes helpfully, but he’s drowned out by Kuroo’s much louder, “They’ve been dating this whole time!”

“ _What,_ ” Atsumu almost shrieks. (No, he didn’t actually shriek, shut up, ‘Samu.)

“And we’re dating, too,” Osamu adds, helping Kuroo thoroughly shatter Atsumu’s worldview.

" _What?_ "

(They get kicked out of the restaurant.)

**Author's Note:**

> extras:
> 
> _tbf i DID try and tell you_
> 
> _shut up you have no rights_
> 
> _“im involved in my own love affair rn"  
>  you told me to just say im useless like a normal person :’))_
> 
> \-- 
> 
> “Shouyou, can you believe this?”
> 
> “Uh, I actually knew the whole time? About Bokuto-san and Akaashi-san, I mean, not Osamu-san and Kuroo-san. Tell them congrats for me, by the way.”
> 
> _“What.”_
> 
> “It was cute how intense you were about it!”
> 
> _“What.”_
> 
> “Bokuto-san told you all about his dates with Akaashi-san. I’m actually kind of impressed you refused to see it.”
> 
> “Shut up.”
> 
> “Don’t mind, Atsumu-san! I love you, anyway.”
> 
> “…I love you, too.”
> 
> most of this was sitting in my drive for a month before i got my butt into gear and decided, "oh i should finish this"
> 
> considering i consumed an entire webtoon, watched several episodes of hannibal, and fell back down the rabbit-hole of fe3h, i thoroughly ruined the "i am going to write a funny fic" vibes i was going for, so mayhaps you can tell where i took my month-long break
> 
> bc i can't shut up: 
>   * otoro sushi? it is...tuna? expensive tuna? from what i could gather. bc atsumu likes fatty tuna according to his wiki. (kuroo shelled out some money for osamu's apology bribe)
>   * things that were supposed to be major and ended up minor/nonexistent: kuroo&atsumu friendship, the bokuaka, kuroo pov and therefore the kuroo/osamu, sibling shenanigans
>   * things that were supposed to be minor but...weren't: atsuhina, and atsumu pov (i wanted to do half atsumu pov, half kuroo pov at first)
>   * bokuaka was established...bokuto just...forgot to tell ppl (bc he thought it was obv), and akaashi took joy in messing w/ kuroo for once. osamu is Devastated that he is on the same level as atsumu & kuroo
>   * why kuroo/osamu? bc it was the funniest option imo
>   * i did not include other inarizaki peeps in the fic, but that is bc im the one lacking, dw atsumu terrorized them all w/ his "bokuaka" conspiracy theories + "i miss hinata" bad mood
>   * bc atsumu pov kicked out kuroo pov completely, i did start an entirely separate fic w/ kuroo pov bc i can't have my crack (pairings) w/o elaborate set-ups i guess, but no guarantees on when i finish writing that
>   * would like to give a shoutout to my only haikyuu friend for the "my spikers' relationship successes" line, as well as the "osamu roasts atsumu too hard" idea (although the jab was originally bout the olympics)
>   * finally, if you are reading this & you are my roommate, _why_ , i told you not to look at me, pls hit the backbutton goodbye
> 



End file.
